Happy Memorial Day

I’ve been going to barbeques and kicking back this weekend. I hope you’re having a good one. 

I was cautiously looking forward to the A&E;Andromeda Strain series.  I loved the book and the Wise movie, but the SFX needed updating, and making it a miniseries would let more of the story be told.
What a fool I was.
It’s grotesquely bad.  Aside from the moonbat content slathered on with a trowel, the original was a SCIENTIFIC thriller.  That’s what made it unusual and extraordinary.  So the Hollywood bozos, not understanding the concept, sort of hand-wave the science and drag out the PC/liberal playbook for making a generic Hollywood action flick.  Men stupid and bad (liberal men are...tolerable).  Woman wise and good.  Military stupid and evil.  Media wise and noble.  Bush lied!  Etcetera.
The amount of PC/enviro/liberal/moonbat crap in the film is amazing.  The dialog sounds like a bowl of lumpy oatmeal.  And one of the reasons the original book and movie were so scary is that they tried to convince you it was all real and plausible.  So in this lame version, when the chief scientist starts making open-line cell phone calls to the highly irritating reporter/crackhead from a “sooper-dooper top secret locked-down hush-hush underground military bio-science lab,” all you can do is laugh.  The final straw is the scientists standing in a meeting room and watching a live feed from the HUD of an F-16 firing a “nuclear-tipped missile.”
Not only am I annoyed they’ve ruined this adaptation, I’m even more annoyed that now they’ve pissed in the pool and there won’t be a good remake of the original for another decade or more.  May they sprout a fulminating carbuncle in their nads.

Posted by  on  05/27  at  03:10 PM

Not surprised. Watch them remake 2001 with more explosions someday.

They’re already planning a movie of Fraggle Rock. Running out of ideas, methinks.

Posted by  on  05/27  at  09:04 PM

I watched the last part, and it’s worse, much worse.  Andromeda is a warning sent from the future to stop us from “raping the planet.” The film then disintegrates into hysterically awful SF gibberish and the ending violates ever law of physics and common sense I can think of. Example: the water coolant pool over the core of the nuclear reactor at the bottom of Wildfire is OPEN TO THE AIR.
There’s even worse, trust me.
All in all, it was the worst SF movie I’ve ever seen that wasn’t made in the 50s, and Michael Crichton has every right to track down the screenwriter and blow his head off with a .44 Magnum.

Posted by  on  05/28  at  07:02 PM
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